Even though, we didn’t knew the baby’s gender. We named him baby Jonathan. I was excited to have another baby boy. But unfortunately, God didn’t will it for us. I don’t know why but probably the answer lies on the next few months or years.
It’s been a few days already but still I can’t help myself. I cry every time I remember him. When I see my pregnancy book, I cry again. When I lay down at bed and remember what happened, I cry again.
Maybe he was a blood, but for me, he is already my baby. It’s hard to accept especially when I remember all the things that I went through before I lost the baby. Yes! I do sometimes blame myself and I cried about this.
Anyway, because of that event, I decided to start blogging. Share my experiences and maybe someday, I can touch lives about this. I kinda discreet right now. I am not that ready to talk more about it. I might cry again.